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Welcome to my movie blog, containing reviews and articles. I've been writing since 2004 - with a short break during 2009.

I don't want to kill everybody, Tom. I just want to hurt them ALL, VERY VERY MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Well, this morning I was going to scream at you all about just how PISSED OFF I am, because half an hour ago I really really was. My head was filled to bursting with thoughts, I was getting a headache and my mind was trotting in very evil circles. I was at a "Don't-fret-I'll-sit-down-and-watch-the-G" stage. Followed by a "I-bet-there's-clips-on-youtube"

I have since put calming music on (It's Hayley Westenra, don't tell anyone! I don't listen to her normally, but this means I don't associate her with anything, and it's pretty relaxing) so you will now be subjected to stress by an unstressed person. actually, to you it'll be more or less the same but I assure you it feels weird...I'm going to scream at you all now to save me the trouble later, to get the vitrol out. Then I may go have a relaxing bath and listen to Classic FM.


Three things annoy me with the movie industry. One's the studio system (Fox in particular. How on earth could they cancel Firefly? It's one of the funniest, original, uncliched series I've ever seen and they cancelled it...didn't they even watch the show?!).

One's voiceover man. Occasionally I'm sane enough to laugh at him, but generally he just annoys me. The worst advert is A Good Woman, which makes me want to puke every time. Although it's not entirely his fault...it's the fault of the scriptwriter who thinks calling Lord Darlington an "international playboy" is either funny or correct, and the entire advert which lasts for two minutes and despite being based on an Oscar Wilde play, contains only half an Oscar Wilde line. Incedentally that line is "Crying is the refuge of plain women..." which the inspired writer tacks "pretty ones go shopping". Screams and spits in an abstract listening-to-easy-listening way. If they can fit that much of the original in the trailer, what can the film be like? I sincerely hope it's not representative.

And the last are movie spoilers. And this really annoys me. There was once a film I really wanted to see that now fills me with self loathing? Why? Because it makes me despise a friend? Why? Because despite reminding her not to spoil it several times, she felt the need to add "And it's really pretty at the end because she's dying and he...." thanks, mate.

That one wasn't worth losing a friend over. But in general I rank my food just below my films, and both above my friends, and I can very vivdly imagine falling out big time over some things. Like the three implied below:

There are 3 films which are above the normal want to watch catagory. These are absolute obsessions, and I know it's insane, but I've got to the dreaming about them stage and everything. Mad, but unavoidable. Did you know that one of them contains a twist ending? Some kind person told me what that was...unavoidably stumbling over a spoiler for the second while on an entirely unconnected site told me what was in store for the only two characters I know are in there (incedentally, thank you Empire for spoiling big time not one but two Godfather movies in under five words. Not just "so-and-so-does-this" but making an entire shock character arc...unshocking.) And the third? Well, folks, this one gets me the spitting maddest. I admit that it's a bit like knowing the horses head in the bed, or the shower scene is coming, but that doesn't make it acceptable? This film only has four characters, and I know what happens to the sum total of three of them!

It's really not fair...

Death warrant of the year goes to the random, evil LJ user who irresponsibly decided that no one would mind a screenshot of a major character bleeding to death on their user icon...

Hey, dude? I hate you big time...

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